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Wednesday, August 26, 2009



Smile always | 23:09

the thing i hate the most...
a friend
of mine

i hate her
not because she was cruel
nor wicked


i hate her
my mother always
her with me

i hate it
when my mom says
"why is it that A**i can get straight A s for exams and why can't you? "

i hate it
when my mom says
"why is it that A**i and you went for the same tuition course but yet she got higher marks than you?"

i hate it
when my mom says
"look at A**i, she is cleverer and more genius than you"

i hate it
when my mom says
"you make me feel so embarrassed when A**i's mother told me about A**i's results"

i hate it
when my mom says
"i am a well-known teacher, and you got these results, how am i gonna tell other people when they ask about your results?"

i hate her very much

i so hoped that she never existed in this world

i know this is really wicked for thinking like that

but i really hate her

i hate her
for her results
for her positions
for everything that she is better than me

why can't my mom
tell me that
"hey, sheng ping, your guzheng is better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, your arts is better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, your calligraphy is better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, you can calculate faster than her"
"hey, sheng ping, your music talents are better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, your bahasa malaysia is better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, your general knowledge is much more better than her"
"hey, sheng ping, you have more confidence than her"

i hate it
when everytime
i got lower results than her

even for one single mark
my mom will nag
nag everytime
when i want something from her
when i tell her i wanna go out with my friends

i am already studying very hard
i just couldn't catch up with her

am i to be blamed?

Smile always | 22:57

Sunday, August 16, 2009

I just want to be loved
By the person close to me
Pretending to have fun even though I want to cry
Is surprisingly easy

I didn’t want to get sad
So I tried not to see the important things

Even though I lose everyone and everything
If only you were with me, that would be enough
Why is it in this world only the most beloved things
Why is it things keep falling out of the palm of my hand

I won’t tell you my real feelings
Because it’s embarrasing
Tears, temperature and smiles might actually exist in this world

From the shore I saw you
and it looked just like a beautiful painting

Even though no one and nothing was left
Because you were here I felt relieved
Even though I didn’t tell you
I thought we would always be together in this world

If the order of tomorrow and today were changed
If tomorrow became yesterday
Would I be able to meet you again

Tell me, what I looked for
And what you looked for
If we found that, what could’ve been
Like this endless sea
If we put our everything into it, would we be able to be together
In this world, if I was deeply loved by you
I wouldn’t be feeling so lonely

Smile always | 14:03

Monday, August 10, 2009

i have to admit,
that i felt that i am becoming more wicked
sometimes i felt that,
how great it will be if

Lee An Ni
existed in this world...

Smile always | 22:48

Friday, August 7, 2009


trials starting from today, man!!!

well it’s just the chinese paper but i think i am kinda in danger~~

cos i THINK i wrote out of the topic in my essay… T.T

the title is “I CHERISH FRIENDSHIP” but i dunno why the heck i wrote something that sounds like “FINALLY, I UNDERSTOOD FRIEDNSHIP”

it’s gotta be ——— well, but my objective paper is QUITE okay….

just, like, 8 mistakes out of 40 questions….. not bad, right?? XD

just hope that i can get an A for the chinese paper… at least 75%….

onegai!!! kami-sama!!!! > <

Smile always | 21:25